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Bam! Bam!

"Ahhh! Jimmy! What were you doing up so late????"

Epiphany # 627 - Opinions

You know them all very well. Rush Limbaugh, Anne Coulter, José Boveé, Micheal Moore. They yell loud and write dirty. And for what reason? Well, for the number one reason we talk about politics or religion at all. We desperately want our opinions to be known.

And why? For some, it could be that they genuinely believe that their ideas are the best. However, as I discussed in my first blog, all morality is relative. Everything you believe is only true for you. Therefore, when you announce your position, you are just letting someone know. "I like yellow! And guns!"

Perhaps we realize that we may be able to bring others to our cause, moving what I like to call the Morality Bell Curve, or MBC, so that we might be closer to its middle. What is the MBC? Well, if morality is relative, then everyone is technically correct to themselves. While you cannot determine what is right or wrong, you can accurately judge a populations morality by plotting every one's beliefs on a curve. For each situation, plot how an American feels, with one end being "for" and the other "against". What you have will look something like this:

Now, no point within that curve is correct, however the majority will always decide how a country deals with issues (or at least should anyway, whether through voting, coup, or revolution). Let's use abortion for an example. The abortion MBC is like this, and you are here:

You are off to one side but still solidly in the middle. Therefore you should be rather satisfied with how your nation deals with the abortion situation. However, let us say that instead you are on a tail, here:

You are generally dissatisfied with the situation, and are calling for change. How do you enact that change? The only sustainable way is by changing minds. By changing the opinion of the public, you can bring the MBC closer to where you stand. This may be the reason that people love talking about their beliefs. They want to convince us.

Or perhaps pundits just like to talk, it is very possible. Good for them, the Morality Bell Curve by definition will always have outliers, those beyond the 95% core of the bell. These areas are called "tails", and it is the tail people who always make the most noise. Pundits themselves are not tails I believe, but take a tail stance on issues to get themselves ratings. Even someone well inside the MBC would be interested in hearing a tail argument, if just to say, "That's crazy!"

Well, interracial marriage was crazy not too long ago, and before that it was cool to marry your twelve year old cousin. Things change, and they do so because the MBC moves. And the MBC doesn't just move back and forth, it also narrows and widens. As a nation develops, the curve expands. If a nation is under restrictive rule, the curve shrinks. Who knows where our MBC will be in twenty years?

To some up, if you want your nation to more accurately reflect your beliefs, you need to do a little campaigning. It is not easy - people are very stubborn about changing their minds. Still, there is a percentage of the public who doesn't hold strong beliefs about certain subjects, and would be happy for some information with which to make a choice. Wars between pundits are fought on the battlefields of your minds. There is no chance for peace, as long as there is the curve.

Now, if you will excuse me, I'll get back to reading Micheal Moore. There's really nothing like hearing your beliefs come from someone else!

Sigmet's Errand

Sigmet thought deeply as he analyzed maps of the grounds in his head. It wasn't that he did not know where to find the tallberry root - it was obvious enough. It was just how to not get killed doing it. It was nearing dusk and the drakes would be dispersing by now, returning to their rookeries in the cliffs where they would torpor for the night. Sigmet removed a loose scale nervously. He was not large, even for a kobold, but was one of the fastest in the keep. He had been personally selected by the All Watcher as a member of the reconnaissance team, a task which he took to heart. Now, with the sun setting, Sigmet dashed from the tunnel and welcomed the cool, dusty desert air.

The kobold's path was direct and thorough. The trip should not have been dangerous; it was only a klick away to the river where the nearest tallberry grew. But tallberry wasn't the only thing attracted to the blue green ripples of the creak. Drakes in good number had built nests in the hills all around the stream, and their territories stretched all through the plateau. Sigmet had once asked the All Watcher why these creatures where allowed to exist, preying as they did on her own kind. "And yet they feed on our enemies, more so. Be light of
foot young Sigmet, and you will not share that fate" she had said.

It was mid dusk now, and the air was clear. Sigmet scrambled quickly from the tunnel's exit to the sides of a mesa, and stuck close. A few more meters, and he dashed off behind a dune, keeping his head to the sky as he went. The fleshy pads of his long legs made hardly a sound on the sandy rock, leaving no footprints behind. Just then a sound caught his attention in the distance. It sounded like the cry of a drake. Had they made a kill? Any number of Kher's Kobolds might be out at any time. Only the All Watcher knew where they were. Losses were acceptable, but it was never good losing comrades.

Another cry rang out, this one coming from the direction of the river. Sigmet ran faster. Hiding behind a rocky outcrop, the kobold took a glance over. There was nothing but the dusty plateau stretching out before him, the odd desert flora or two jutting from the sandy ground like fingers of some green prickly monster.

Sigmet dashed from one plant to the other, keeping low and listening intently. A kobold has no outer ear, likes birds or the dragons they claim to share ancestry with. Yet Sigmet's hearing was no less sharp. He could hear voices - and they were speaking common. He thought momentarily of returning, but curiosity was getting the best of him. Besides, what would the All Watcher think if he didn't return with some tallberry root? And what would she think of him if he returned with that and information too...

He snugged up to an embankment, now only 500 meters or so from the river. From there he could hear the distant calls of the drakes, and they seemed perturbed. Sigmet risked another glance. Ahead of him, at the banks of the river, was a troop of men, human men by the looks of it, and in combat gear. Some appeared to be holding bows, and were firing at a circle of hunting drakes, who darted out of the sky to take strikes at them. Sigmet took a sniff. Downwind as he was, he could detect no fear from the warriors, but instead excitement. His eyes flashed quickly towards the river, and spotted a patch of his quarry, the tallberry.

The kobold thought quickly. He could wait, and see if the party would move on, taking as many details as he could to report to the Watcher. However, the plateau place was no more peaceful during the night as it was the day. Packs of hyenas roamed the lands during the dark hours, and they would emerging from their dens soon.

He did not have time to wait for these men to leave, nor to go further down the river to find the root. If he was quiet though, he might be able to sneak a few hundred meters upstream and grab the root without the humans even knowing he was there. Sigmet glanced again, and his sharp yellow eyes surveyed the carnage. Several drakes had fallen, and the humans had lost at least three men. The combat seemed to be over however, the flying beasts retreating for the night and an easier meal tomorrow. Sigmet counted five remaining humans, which were now tending to wounds and appeared to be setting up camp. Time was running out, and Sigmet had to be quick.

The kobold dashed quietly along the embankment, keeping low. At what he presumed was about a hundred meters, he poked his head up again. The humans were still setting up the camp, and tending wounds, but a quick headcount revealed only four warriors. He hesitated but didn't have time to figure out where the other had gone. Sigmet climbed up over the embankment and scampered towards the river, relying on the dimming light to provide him cover. His movements were whisper quiet, and the markings of his skin blended well with the rocky surrounding.

A quick glance reassured Sigmet that he hadn't been noticed. 50, 25, 10 meters. There. A group of tallberry grew through the muddy floodplain, enough to heal hundreds of wounds and cure twice that many ailments. So far Kher Keep's attempt at growing it was futile; tallberry was a very fickle plant. But a very valuable one. Sigmet gripped the plants strongly by the stalks and took a pull.

Soon he was dashing low again towards the embankment. The humans were still oblivious, gathering their kills and it appeared planning something over a piece of parchment. Looking at them now they appeared Barivian, but with the garment and tools of the mercenary. Perhaps they were just prospectors, passing by or looking for minerals. Whatever the reason, Sigmet needed to inform his Queen.

At the embankment, Sigmet slowed to catch his breath. The journey from here would be clear, and hopefully he could hit the Keep before the Hyenas began their prowl. A quick skip over a mound landed him on the other side of the embankment, and into a heavy fist. Sigmet hit the ground rolling, too dazed to recover. His attacker wrapped a thick hand around Sigmet's neck and hung the tip of a sword just above his throat. "Well well," teased the human, a dark man with coarse features, "a kobold eh? What are you doing this far outside the warren? The human's gaze wafted over the bunch of tallberry root, still clenched in Sigmet's fist. "Ah, gone shopping, how nice. What, for your girlfriend?" At this the hairy man laughed, raining spittle, and Sigmet struggled to breath.

The kobold's mind raced. At this proximity, he could tell the individual was definitely Barivian, but did not wear the customary tabard, nor did he meet the strict standards for Barivian appearances. As the initial pain wore off, Sigmet's head cleared. "What you doing here?" he snapped in gruff common. "You no welcome here, our land!" This made the hairy man laugh, letting sweat fly and rubbing the tip of the sword painfully against Sigmet's neck. The kobold cringed.

"What am I doing here? Wrong question scale face. These grounds don't belong to you. They belong to the Stonecutter Clan. You know, those band of dwarves you mercilessly murdered?" Sigmet did not know any dwarves, but he had heard rumors that Kher Keep had been a dwarven stronghold before it fell into kobold hands. Sigmet attempted to stall.

"Me don't know any dwarfs. No dwarfs here, you come to wrong place!" This made the man howl louder, and that was Sigmet's cue. With practiced agility, the Kobold lifted a dagger from his belt and plunged it into the man, piercing past his armor into his side. The warrior's expression change from surprise to pain, and he rolled off the kobold, gurgling. Just then, he could hear voices coming from the camp. He lifted himself up and ran.

He could hear the voices louder now, along with the creaking sound of arrows being nocked. Instinctively, he ran in a zig zag pattern, avoiding the arrows as they fell around him. The misses were near however, and they were getting tighter. Sigmet picked up speed and dove behind a rock just as three shots struck right where his head would have been.

Gasping, he scurried along the rock's length until a short clearing let him to the rows of green fleshy plants. He dashed from the first, to the second, and chanced a look to see if the men were still following. At first he saw nothing, but the whiz and plop of an arrow landing in the cactus next to him knew they were still on his trail. Now Sigmet was at a dilemma. He did not want the warriors to follow him to the Keep, but he couldn't stick around and wait them out either. Losing them was also out of the picture, for they were at least as fast as he was. It was then that he picked up the howling in the distance. This gave him an idea.

The hunters hustled into the plateau, bows drawn and eyes ready. There were three of them, one with a bandaged wound around his arm. The scanned the horizon, taking positions that were distinctly military, ruling out in Sigmet's mind their involvement as mercenaries. No, these were real troops, undercover troops. It was unfortunate for them that they underestimated his kind so much.

A noise stirred the archers, and a puff of dust attracted their attention. They fired, but their arrows only struck bare dirt. Within a moment they had reloaded, and a new puff sent another volley into the distance. "It's playing with us" one of the men whispered, and delivered several hand gestures. With hardly a sound, the men took positions which mostly obscured them, and began hopping from place to place, much as Sigmet had done to escape. No, these men were definitely well trained. Wouldn't the Watcher be interested to know they were here.

Another howl let Sigmet know the time was right. He dashed from behind the whumpus skeleton he'd been using as his hiding place, aand began west towards the keep. A hiss of arrows followed ending with a yelp, and Sigmet struck the ground rolling.

The three men removed themselves from hiding. The men slowly approached him, bows drawn,
ignorant of the sounds of padded feet behind them. Sigmet did not stir but did crack an eye ever so slightly to watch the looming shapes behind the men. The giant hyenas burst forward with a cry and lunged at the warriors. Surprised, only one managed to turn and get a shot off before being tackled by the beasts. Screams accompanied the sounds of rending flesh as all three were overtaken. Fighting for his life , one of the warriors still managed to catch a glimpse of his leathery kill, scrambling quickly away over the flats without so much as a sign of injury.

---

"These warriors, you say they were Baravian?"
"Yes, my Queen" responded Sigmet. The All Watcher did not look amused, but she never did except in battle.
"And none were left alive?"
"Two injured humans were left at the camp. I doubt they'll survive long." The Queen chuckled.
"Good, but I doubt that's the last we will see of those humans. The Baravians are not out here prospecting for minerals. They want to know if there are still dragonborn in Kher Keep. They want to know if I'M still in Kher Keep. Well this is their answer." Sigmet nodded.

"Excellent work my child. You are released. I must now convene with my harem to prepare for war." Sigmet flashed his teeth respectfully and left from the hall. She was proud of him, and that meant many a good think for Sigmet in Kher Keep.

The Queen returned to her quarters, sending a spell that would summon her harem to her from all around the fortress. She hadn't had a good battle on her hands since they slew the Stonecutters all those years ago. And now the Bavarians wanted action.

It's about time, Rohgahh thought, and she smiled.

Relative Morality and the Concept of the Utopia

I have always considered myself to be an upstanding person, the real life Paladin who is a champion for the meek and a harbinger of good. Imagine my surprise the other day when I discovered the idea of relative morality, the concept that morals are untestable and therefore cannot be proved. If this is the case, then everything that I believe to be good is just a matter of opinion! How depressing.

The revelation of relativity, in a moral sense, has forced me to come to new conclusions about the world around me. I am a socialist, and I have always believed in the inherent good of people and that one day things would be better. Through education and communication the people of the earth could slow down and even reverse the population boom, eliminate poverty, and throw capitalism aside for a more fair and just economic principle. How foolish of me.

This prediction was formulated on the assumption of an absolute moral code, a universal ideal shared by all intelligent beings. Through education, everyone would soon "get it", and it would be obvious that my utopia was the best option for the future of mankind. Once this assumption becomes invalid, it too nullified my prediction. So what can I make from this new evidence?

If morality is non universal, then it is irrelevant. Relative morality is nothing more than an expression of opinion, or emotion (as an emotivist would gladly tell you). That being said, you certainly cannot establish utopias off your own sense of morality; it wouldn't be a utopia by definition, because it wouldn't be pleasant for all involved. I recall that mistakes such as these had been made before, so called "Utopias" that truly failed. Third Reich anyone? I certainly don't want to be messing about in that department.

So Utopia is effectively impossible in a world without universal morals. What is there then to look forward to? Fortunately, there are still some universal concepts that will allow mankind to progress and unify. These are the fundamental needs of a civil society, a group of rules which are a necessity for everyday function. Many of these concepts are laws in the present day, although the books don't convey everything that I believe is necessary.

Take murder for example. People have many differing opinions on this subject, but everyone can agree that murder hurts business as usual. Fear of being killed would keep many in their homes, away from work and (gasp) shopping! Add to this rules against theft, battery, manslaughter, perjury, extortion, and all other kinds of goodies, which without our country wouldn't have lasted as long as it has. Rules, unlike morals, are straightforward, and can be categorized as "forbidding of actions which will harm the day to day functioning of society, or insistence on actions that will enhance it". Even in tribal societies there were similar rules to establish cooperation. Without them, communities crumble.

Unfortunately several moral concepts slip past the checks and balances and become laws. A moral law is any which either forbids actions which do not threaten the function of society, or insists on actions which do not enhance it. These are not universal and thus cannot be forced upon all people. This is not a moral view, but a logical one. A society which forces moral values on a populace is a society which will surely fail.

What about morality then? Ethics must be addressed for a community to survive. Fortunately, it just so happens that we have a system which is set up to deal with this. Actually, when thinking about it I almost cried, because in the case of relative morality we actually have one of the best systems available. It's called democracy, the concept of governance by the people. In democracies, people vote, and what a better way to establish national morals than by a majority vote? I'm not saying the end result will please everyone, but it will please enough to minimize the chance of revolution.

Remember, I am not discussing my moral outlook here, but my view of what the most stable society would be. For questions such as abortion, in order to keep the country from splitting on it, have them vote. Even when the majority wins, the minority knows that it will have a chance to vote again on the subject in the future, or other things that are important to them. This establishes a legitimacy with the government, and ensures its continuing longevity.

Of course, in any good democracy it is imperative that the will of the people is properly represented. Misrepresentation leads to resentment and a loss of legitimacy. Unfortunately our current government falls short of this ideal. Politicians are repeatedly courted and bought, eroding the public collective trust. Our representatives really represent the corporations and special interest, the two of which rarely have the people's best interest in mind. The whole charade is then dressed up as "democracy" to provide legitimacy, and the big wigs go along with the facade to enhance the public trust in its faulty representation.

Such a system will inevitably fall however, no matter how hard the guys on top try to keep the wool over our eyes. You see the results all the time, of people in the streets, rioting and protesting. No amount of police or oppressive laws will deter this (in fact, it only enhances it). On that topic, I believe protest is an essential element of representative democracy. In a country where someone else is buying all your votes, how are you going to have your voice heard? Attempt to eliminate protesting, and you have a revolution on your hands.

To sum up, morality may very well be a relative concept. In light of this, it is impossible to say whether one moral argument is better than another. The best option is to compromise on the situation, achieved by voting and enhanced by negotiation. No one will ever be completely happy with their country, but as long as a populace feels legitimately involved they will be proud. In terms of stability, you can never go wrong with a proud population.